Grisly Guest Article #1

Evening, cretins!

Tonight I have the pleasure in presenting a first here at Samityville; some guest writing by fellow horror fan and aspiring writer Ross Tipograph. When he's not reviewing movies and majoring in screenwriting at Emerson College, Ross also writes about Halloween Costumes over at Star Costumes (an awesome little online store you guys should definitely check out).

The following is a great little piece Ross has written about the current wave of 3D flicks sweeping our screens and their potential impact on our beloved horror genre.

Enjoy!
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I Blame James Cameron - by Ross Tipograph

There is a phenomenon in film today – and it is a plague. This new trend is the dysentery of filmmaking, a tacky gimmick that, once upon a time, was a fun few-times-in-a-lifetime event but now exists in every multiplex near you. I am talking about 3-D movies, becoming as apparent in the horror genre as in any other. I blame James Cameron.

Let me begin by discussing my trip to the Film Forum movie theater in New York City just the other day. For those United States east-coasters, check out the Forum because it’s currently playing a two-week long festival of 3-D movies from the 1950s. Back then, when the technology of 3-D was invented, it was a showstopper. People literally fainted at the sight of the movie action popping off the screen, and upon my visit, I understood why. I saw Man in the Dark, a slinky noir, produced in 1953 as the first major 3-D motion picture in America, and I was flabbergasted; the 3-D was used in this film to an extent where I was literally dodging knives and screaming “Ow!” with the rest of the giddy audience when a wrench was thrown in our direction – and these were just projected images on a screen. It was absolutely thrilling.

Today’s 3-D technology, however, seems to be missing the point entirely. I repeat: I blame James Cameron. Avatar, released last year, was seriously the turning point for this technology, “making it more of an experience,” quote-quote, for the moviegoers. It “puts you inside the movie,” said Cameron in several interviews. I find this statement seriously debatable.

Before Avatar, maybe no more than four or five movies were released in 3-D each year, and I remember people avoiding them like it was swine flu. I recall Robert Rodriguez had Spy Kids 3-D¬ and The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl in 3-D, both of which I secretly love but nobody saw. There was Beowulf, remember that one? It wasn’t until 2009 that we were suddenly bombarded with: Avatar, A Christmas Carol, Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, G-Force, one of the eighty Ice Age sequels, a Jonas Brothers concert movie, Monsters vs. Aliens, and Up. 2010 has graduated from more than just 3-D animated movies: Alice in Wonderland, Clash of the Titans, Cats & Dogs 2, The Last Airbender, and Step Up 3-D, among others. It’s a pandemic. Even worse, if you’ve seen any of these films, none of them use the famed popping-out, in-your-face effects that used to make 3-D films so entertaining, and most importantly, worth our money. Now, they’re simple gimmicks – a scam to raise the ticket prices, and everyone’s giving in.

The horror genre, quite surprisingly, is now enduring its own 3-D virus. We’ve recently had Friday the 13th and My Bloody Valentine, both ‘80s remakes, released in 3-D, both films proving to be extremely underwhelming. We also saw The Final Destination, the fourth in the series, which I can happily say used 3-D correctly with plenty of splattered gore in our faces; I hear the Piranha 3-D is equally appealing. The outlook in 3-D horror movies is, however, not so good, as some awful upcoming titles come to mind: Saw 3D and The Ring 3D, for two. The positive side: My Soul to Take and The Cabin in the Woods, from Wes Craven and Joss Whedon, respectively.

Personally, I find this whole revolution very unnecessary. The 3-D technology used in most movies now, especially in animated children’s comedies (which seem to be incessantly released, like those little gophers popping up in that arcade game where you have to beat them down with a mallet, but they just will not stop), does nothing for entertainment value. There’s no good-natured dodging of objects, or hilarious pop-out moments; it’s simply more “glittery,” if that word could be allowed use in this context. The 3-D makes the picture more like eye-candy, but it creates not an ounce more a fun than the film would have if it were in 2-D and for five dollars less.

Perhaps the horror genre is the only place the gimmick could remotely be welcome. Horror has sunk so low recently. Why not sink lower? Go crazier? Add 3-D?

Is 3-D technology a genre reinvention, a routine that occurs every few decades in the horror world? Is it just another awful trend, much like Japanese horror remakes and torture porn? Or, is this the end to cinema and mankind as we know it? That’s a little dramatic, perhaps. But things better shape up, or 3-D movies will brainwash us into emptying our wallets for centuries to come.

I blame James Cameron.